It only took a minute or two for me to feel totally comfortably in Jaylen's arms. Which, I guess is a good thing...because he didn't seem to be open to the idea of letting me go any time soon. He just seemed to be trying to catch his breath for a while, and I couldn't help but to give him repeated kisses on his cheek as we laid there together. He was so beautiful. He really was. I couldn't stop holding him and wanting to kiss him again and again. It almost hurt to look at him. He was the kind of boy that I always wanted growing up. Sexy, flirtatious, smart, witty...to actually see a boy like that up close, have his nude body pressed up against you in bed...it almost seemed too good to be true.
And yet, here he is. Right by my side. A gorgeous specimen of what a perfect boyfriend might look like if I had ever gotten the chance to nab one for myself when I had the chance.
I think I was looking at his heaving stomach, watching the six pack appear, disappear, and then reappear, with every heavy breath...mesmerized by his body's perfection and intricate design...when he suddenly gave me another kiss on the lips, and he sat up in bed. "You have no clue how long I've been wanting to do that with you, Coach. I mean, seriously...tonight was, like...the biggest Christmas miracle ever. Hehehe! I loved it!" Then he leaned over to kiss me again, and then he got up, that cute little ass of his wiggling as he walked to the foot of the bed, looking for his underwear.
He made some small talk at first, but I could tell that he was still kind of weak in the knees as he tried to put his undies back on. I gave him a sideways look, and with a grin, I asked, "You leaving?"
"Huh?" He asked, confused. "Oh...well...I mean, don't you want me to? I figured this was the part where you told me to scram."
How CUTE is that? "Hehehe, why? Are you worried that my mom is going to come home and catch us having sex?"
Thinking about it for a second, Jaylen giggled to himself, thinking about how ridiculous that sounded. "Wait...so I can stay for a while? Do you mean it?"
"Who the heck have you been dating, Jaylen? Of course, you can stay. This is MY apartment, after all." I told him. "Relax. Come here..."
Jaylen was quick to pull his underwear back down to his ankles again to kick them off and climb back into bed with me. This time, I pulled the covers back and let us both get underneath them, hopefully to keep him warm. Even if covering up a body like his was the last thing I'd normally want to do. He backed himself into me so that I could spoon him from behind, draping my arm around him and brushing his hair back a bit to kiss him on the cheek again. So addictive. So very alluring.
"We've got plenty of time. K?" I told him, and he turned to jelly in my arms. Heh...cute.
You know...there was a time when I said I was simply 'done' with falling in love...but there was just something so exquisite about Jaylen's charm that truly ignited a spark in me that made me think otherwise. I can't even remember how long it's been since I've ever felt so close to somebody. And this was just after one evening of chit chatting over a few drinks at a bar. Now, I've got this graceful young Christmas angel in bed with me...naked and warm...still sighing wistfully over finally taking 'sex with my old high school track team coach' off of his things to do before he regrets not taking a shot. You know?
Who knew? Right?
"This is...nice." Jaylen said quietly. It was just above a whisper, but he definitely wanted me to hear it. "It's different, you know?"
"Yeah. Like...you don't just get what you need from me and then tell me to hit the bricks. Heh...it's different." Then he asked, "Oh man, that doesn't sound bad, does it? I mean, I don't just sleep around or anything, I just meant..."
"Hehehe, it's ok, Jaylen. Really. I know what you mean." I said. "Boys really do mature eventually. They'll get places of their own, and they'll go looking for more than a few weekend hook ups, and their tastes won't be half as shallow as they were in high school, or even in college. Once they get all of that sex-crazed energy out of their system...they'll go looking for something more. Someone genuine."
"Someone of 'quality'?" Jaylen said. It was really cute the way that he said it, and it got him another kiss on the cheek from me.
"Definitely. Someone of quality. Someone like you, sweetie."
Suddenly, Jaylen said, "Oh, dude! I didn't get you off yet! I'm sorry! I exploded all over the place and I totally forgot that you hadn't gotten the chance to, like..."
Giggling, I just tried to pet his soft hair and calm him down. "Shhhh, relax. It's fine. This is already one of the best dates that I've ever had. So you've got nothing to worry about."
"Really? I find that hard to believe."
"Believe it or don't believe it. It's the truth."
"You're totally letting this swanky apartment with the view of the Lake go to waste, Coach." He said.
"Oh, is that so?" I said, gently tickling his ribs and making him laugh. "Maybe one day I'll find my Prince Charming, and I'll be sure to let him know that my 'swanky' apartment is worth putting up with my bullshit."
But, it was then that Jaylen rolled onto his back so he could turn his head and look me in the eye. He smiled at me, those shiny brown marbles nearly paralyzing me with their brilliance, and he said, "For what it's worth, Coach...I'm glad that I got here first. That Prince Charming jackass took too long to come and claim you for his own." Adding, "Lucky me..."
As I let my eyes wander down, I saw that Jaylen was already hard again. And not just a little bit. Like...rock hard. As though he hadn't just experienced an orgasm that would put even boys his age to sleep directly afterward. I snickered a little bit, "Wow..."
"What? Hehehe, I can't help it. You're SO hot!"
"Ok, Jaylen...no need to go that far."
"I'm not kidding!" He said, rolling into me to kiss me deeply on the lips again while laying his bare leg across me. I swear, I could just hump the smooth surface of the inside of his thigh and probably go blind from the climax that it brought me. "You could probably have a hundred boys like me in your bed right now if you wanted to."
With a smile, I kissed him sweetly on his lips. "There are no other boys like you."
I don't think I've ever seen a wider smile then the one that spread across Jaylen's face in that moment. "Omigod...see? You're sweet too! You're the greatest catch that a gay boy could ever ask for."
"Is that right?"
"Yeah." He moaned, lightly rubbing his nose against mine before kissing me on the lips again. "You caught me, after all."
It as hard to believe how quickly I felt my emotions being stirred into a frenzy for the first time in years. At least with this level of turbulence. For a moment there, I thought I was a teenager again myself. Especially when he took a hold of me beneath the sheets, giving me a firm stroke or two. His palms were like silk, and I felt my eyes roll back as he began to suck lovingly on the side of my neck. Almost exactly the same way that I had done for him just moments ago. He learns fast. I like that.
He then slid his hand back up to rub the small cluster of hairs on my chest. He seemed to really enjoy the texture, letting it tickle his palm as he moved in tiny circles. I've never really been all that hair to begin with, but I suppose to somebody who's as smooth as a greased dolphin...it was a bit of a different experience for him.
It wasn't long afterward that I could feel him scooting further down in the bed, and I watched as his head disappeared underneath the blanket as he took a hold of me again...and moaned passionately as he admired my size. Again, never really thought of myself as a monster, but it was more than what he was used to.
The feeling of his tongue licking up and down the top half of my shaft, his grip holding it up at the base, caused me to feel weightless. And when those angelic lips opened up to suck me into his warmth...I found myself gripping the sheets myself. Oh wow...ok, he's definitely had some practice with this. He's...ooh...oh my!
His mouth was so wet. His tongue was so 'alive' with activity. And he was an expert at keeping his teeth shielded the entire time. Already, I felt myself tightening up, and wanted to keep this evening going for just a little bit longer. So I tried to lift his chin and bring him back up to kiss me...even though he stayed down there to give me a few more long sucks before rejoining me for another intense make out session. I held his slim body against me with a powerful grip, massaging the marshmallow soft mounds of his ripe, beautifully shaped, ass. And that's when he rolled me over on top of him...his sapling legs snaking their way around my waist as he clung to me and begged me to press my weight down upon him...and to grind on him while he breathlessly enjoyed every last lustful second of it. How the hell did I get so lucky tonight? Seriously...how?
As I kept fighting off my impending orgasm, I let my lips part from his and just looked down into his dreamy brown eyes...my heart being warmed, through and through, by the tantalizing smile he shot back at me. I just had to admire him for a moment. The flawless grace of him was almost too much for me to bear. I reached up to brush some of his hair over to the side, and he kissed my hand when I touched him. He was so very turned on. Already throbbing and wiggling beneath me, prepared for his second explosion of the evening.
"Say...do you have any 'slick' around?" He asked.
"Slick? What is slick?"
With a tender blush, Jaylen said, "You know...lube...?"
OH!!! Oh my! Keep your head, Ted! Keep your sense of self control!
Doing my best not to stutter, I said, "Jaylen...I mean, you don't have to feel like you need to..."
"Oh no! I definitely need to!" He grinned. "It's like...the best part of my fantasy. Come on! I really really want this!" Then Jaylen playfully batted his girlish eyelashes at me, teasing, "It would be my Christmas miracle this year...."
What was I going to do? Make him beg? It's not like I'm expecting to ever get another chance at something like this again. Heh...don't judge me! It's his Christmas miracle!
I'm doing it in a charitable sort of way. I swear.
"I...I think I might have some in my dresser drawer if you're really serious about..."
"I'll get it!" He said, rolling me off of him as he energetically sprang up to his feet and walked over to see what he could find. Completely naked. His pert little ass, a fine specimen of teardrop perfection. An almost comically pale tan line, but sexy just the same. "Which drawer, Coach?"
I feel just a little more guilty about this every time he calls me 'Coach'. "Middle drawer. Left side." He opened it up and rummaged through it for a bit before finding what he was looking for.
"How old is this thing?" He chuckled.
"I don't know. Why? It doesn't have an expiration date on it does it? I haven't been in action as often as I used to be."
"Hehehe, of course it's got an expiration date on it, dude. Lucky for us, though...yo haven't hit it yet. Still, you'll be in need of some more some time soon." He smiled at me warmly, and then practically skipped his way back to the bed to yank the covers off and join me once again. He was so excited, hard as a steel pipe, and laid on his back with his knees folded to open his cleft slightly and expose his hole to apply some of the lube around the ridges.
I just laid there and watched him silently for a bit. He was staring off into space, his back arched, just the tip of his tongue visible on the side of his mouth as he concentrated on getting himself ready. Hehehe, utterly adorable. "Do you mind if I lend a hand?" I asked. And he smiled as he handed me the tube and watched as I put a healthy dollop on my middle finger. "Relax..." I whispered.
"Relax me yourself." He grinned in response, and I leaned in to smash my lips against his while he closed his eyes and sighed as though it was the most breathtaking kiss that he had ever experienced before in his life.
It was then that I started to slicken up his tight little ring. Smaller than I even expected it to be, but eager enough to quiver with delight as soon as it felt me touch it. I put some more on my finger, taking my time to distract him with my passionate kiss as I moved back down to give a little more pressure to his hole...eventually feeling his young body yield to my cravings...opening up to give me the most intimate of invitations. His body tensed up slightly, but I made sure that I was very careful with him. The more he focused on sliding his tongue back and forth across my own, the less he thought about what a hurry he was in for the main event. So...little by little...I began to slide further and further into him. I was in no big rush. As much as he may have desired the penetration, I've learned through years of experience that it makes things much more pleasurable for the both of us when I take my time.
By the time I was in up to my second knuckle...Jaylen's body was reacting in ways that I don't even think he ever thought it could. He was breathing so heavily, and attempted multiple times to impale himself on my digit fully...but I didn't let him. Not yet. Instead, I continued my slow exploration of his athletic body and let him tingle and twitch in my arms as I reached for that special little spot within him. A spot that, once I touched it, caused him to gasp and whimper in a high pitched squeal that he tried his best to stifle to keep me from knowing how amazing it felt.
His body began to shiver and shake as I tickled that spot, and his legs went limp as his inner muscles swirled up to crush my finger from all sides. Not to force it out of him...but more to suckle at it like a hungry calf. "Oh...my...GAWD...!" He purred, unable to hold himself still. "I never...wow...I don't think I've ever felt so...oh shit...!" He babbled, and I began to slowly and expertly open him up a bit more, getting him used to the invasion as I lightly stretched the resistant hole just a little bit wider. When he lunged forward to kiss me again, I don't think he had even paid attention to the second finger entering his tight hole shortly afterward. And just as his copious leakings were reaching a point where I thought he might lose another load right there in my arms, I decided that it would be now or never.
There was still a part of my brain that wanted to keep hesitating. A part that kept asking me to be sure that I wanted to go through with this. A part that didn't know whether I was more worried about Jaylen becoming too attached all of a sudden...or if I was.
But...the show must go on.
"You ready, hon?" I asked, kissing his lips gently. He just closed his eyes and nodded his head, letting a boyish whine as I dislodged my fingers from his personal spot. He began panting heavily, and I rested my hand on that firm tummy of his as I moved over to crawl between his spread eagle legs on my knees to get myself into position. I certainly hope that taking my time with him tonight will help to make him comfortable.
My heart was beating so hard that I could feel my ear drums pulsing in time with it. I was erect to the point where it ached with wanting for this boy. This...person of 'quality. He was so soft, so pliable as I folded his legs back and got a good look at his rose colored entrance for the first time. Small, but wanting. Tight, but anxious. His brown eyes opened and looked down to witness the moment...and I had to use a hand to press up against his mini orifice, careful not to push forward until he was relaxed and ready for it. I can't remember the last time I was so hot and bothered over another boy. This was truly something special tonight.
How long was it? A minute? Two minutes? It didn't matter. I let him get used to the idea of being fully penetrated. And when he was willing to allow me entrance, I looked down to see his delicious ass lips engulf me and clamp down in an attempt to pull me further inside of him. I just stuck the tip in at first, but it was enough to know that his body temperature was hot enough to nearly raise a sweat on my brow. And the desperate whimper that came out of him when I was able to slide a full inch or two into him was better than any angels' symphony that could ever come down from Heaven above. The purest music my ears have ever heard.
I felt his hands on the back of my shoulders, his legs wrapped around me as he tried to angle that pretty rump further up to accept even more of me. I had enough control to keep my initial stroke as gentle and loving as it possibly could be, and I don't think that he was used to that. Probably more acquainted with his teen lovers looking to get off and pump away like crazy without much consideration for their partner. But I had matured beyond that. Way beyond that. And after the way Jaylen made me feel from the first time our eyes met in that neighborhood bar...I was going to make sure that he got a taste of what making love to a compassionate and caring man was really like. It'll be something he'll never forget.
There were a few moments where his legs tensed up, his face wrinkling up with the cutest little frown...and I made sure to stop and let him get himself better adjusted. It wasn't easy. He was sooooo tight. It felt like it was literally milking me with the way it was moving without moving. Total bliss would be an understatement. I kissed him to relax again...and as out tongues mingled with one another, I tenderly slid the rest of my length into him, feeling the bottom of those bubbled cheeks resting against my thighs. Jaylen moaned out loud, his body stretching out for me as he did his best to remember to breathe. And it was then that I made my first withdrawal from him. A slow tease that made him open his eyes and look down to make sure that I wasn't leaving the moist confines of his sensual tunnel just yet. I didn't. I just pulled out to the very tip, and then slowly inserted myself back into his love...lowering my head to suck on the nape of his neck again.
"Mmmmm...God, that feels good..." He sighed. "More."
I pushed myself all the way in again, feeling him jump a bit as I passed his prostate and rubbed it lovingly with my tip by circling my hips a bit. And then pulled out again. Then back in...a bit quicker this time. And before long, there was a constant rhythm passing between us. One that began slow and sexy, but was soon making the springs of my mattress squeak with the increased speed of my thrusts.
Jaylen definitely enjoyed sex. He didn't say anything clear enough for me to decipher, but his moans and whimpers were getting louder, and he was pretty shameless when it came to vocally expressing his appreciation for the passionate plunges into his intimate depths that I was giving him. His boyish yelps for more made me moan out loud as well as my hips began an instinctual mating ritual that seemed to react all on its own. I pushed harder...deeper...having Jaylen reach up to press his lips against mine again as we both began to sweat. His juicy hole, constricting itself around to a degree that rivaled the vice like grip of my own fist during my horniest fantasies in this room alone. The blankets began to fall off of the edge of the bed as Jaylen's fingers dug in and began to rake my back. Then he suddenly reached behind him to clutch at the pillow under his head, whimpering as he tossed it off of the bed to lay back fully on the mattress. I was close...oh so close!
Unable to fully find a comfortable spot on the bed, Jaylen suddenly put his hands on my chest and pushed to roll me over onto my back. He wasted no time at all straddling my lap and guiding me back inside of him...and I could swear that he felt even tighter than he did before! This was an entirely different view of him, and as he slid himself down to the base of my length, he began to rise and fall with a vigor that surprised me. His eyes closed, his abs tightened up, his lips parted as his floppy brown locks bounced right along with him. I reached forward to feel the flex of his cherished ass cheeks as they dimpled up on both sides and he began a fluid grind on my lap that left me breathless. I swear...if my heart stops right here and now...it'd be totally worth it! This boy was AMAZING!
The tightness of him was quickly taking me over the edge, as well as the unspeakable beauty of seeing a boy that cute truly lost in the throes of passion...swiveling his hips in ways that would make any professional dancer jealous...
...But what really set me off was watching his bouncing erection suddenly stiffen up, the tip expanding for a brief moment, and then shooting a second load all over my chest and stomach without him even touching himself. Once I felt the warm jets of his enthusiastic arousal spilling its cherished product all over my bare skin...I found it impossible to hold on for a moment longer. I'm surprised that, even with all my years of practice, that I was able to hold on for this long!
Feeling my balls draw up, lightheaded and off-balance...I held on to the sides of his extremely slim waist and pushed myself up into his gripping hole for the last two or three seconds that I had before unleashing a torrential storm of seed deep into him...his body squeezing and milking me for every last goddamn DROP until I felt so faint and became so sensitive that I had to practically beg him to stop before it killed me.
Huffing and puffing...my body still convulsing with post-coital aftershocks...my chest still sticky with Jaylen's generous offering...I found myself staring up at the ceiling as though I had lost my virginity for the very first time all over again. I've never experienced anything like that before in my life. Oh my God...so this is what it feels like? Being overwhelmed by an incredible partner.
It took Jaylen to make me realize that I've never really had one before. Geez...soooo much wasted time when I was younger. So many opportunities lost. If only I could have found a boy like him when I had the chance. My whole...life could have been different. So different.
I'm not sure how long Jaylen and I laid there in each other's arms, cuddled up, with him snuggling up to me and getting his breathing back to normal while running his fingers over my chest hair again. There was something really comfortable about it. Surreal.
And yet...the more I thought about things, the more I began to feel guilty about all this. Don't get me wrong, I loved every minute of it. Oh my GOD, did I love it! And I had a lot of fun just getting to know Jaylen on a personal level too. He was such a sweetheart. More so than I ever could have imagined.
But...holding that boy's beautifully naked body next to me in my bed...faint to the point where I thought he was going to doze off to sleep at any moment...I couldn't help but to feel slightly selfish about it all. Does that make sense?
I thought about the times that I had with other boys growing up, and the pseudo relationships that I've had later on in my college and adult years...and then I thought about me sitting in that bar earlier tonight, all by myself, trying to dodge the boredom. Even more...trying to dodge the regret of not taking advantage of all the opportunities that I could have when I was Jaylen's age. He got a chance to get the ball rolling much younger than I did. I mean, heh...fifteen. Hell, maybe even younger than that. He's a go-getter. That's for certain.
I don't know. I just...I didn't want him to find himself sitting in a bar by himself, all alone on Christmas. There's still time left for him to find a 'quality' boy of his own. Not just an old high school fantasy pick...but somebody amazing. Somebody amazing. You know?
At that moment, Jaylen's phone alarm went off, and he leaned over the edge of the bed to reach for it. God, what a perfect ass on that boy. Hehehe! "Shit...I've gotta move my car. The last thing I need is to get towed for Christmas. My mom will throw a fit." He grinned.
My heart sank a little bit, but I tried not to let it show. "Probably for the best." I said. "I'll get dressed and walk back with you."
"Cool!" He said, and had to scramble around the room a bit to find all of his clothes. Hehehe, they were scattered everywhere. But, as with everything else that he does...it was adorable to watch him do it.
"You know...if you want to give me your keys, I can move the car for you to get it off the street." I offered. "In case you wanted to take a shower or anything."
"You're awesome, Coach. But no thanks. If I come home smelling like soap and shampoo, my mom will know that I've been up to no good tonight. Heh..."
"So much for keeping you off of Santa's naughty list this year then, huh?" I grinned, still feeling a pinch of loss as I saw him putting his socks and shoes on. He really was going away, wasn't he?
"Ok. I think that's everything." He said, and he moved forward to give me one last lingering kiss on my lips. "You ready?"
It took a bit of a struggle to look away from those heavily enticing eyes of his, but I managed to reach for my winter coat and say, "Ready when you are." Giving him the green light to open the door and step into the hallway so we could get him back in time to save his car from the impound lot.
The air had cooled down another five to ten degrees at this late hour, a soft flurry of snowflakes falling from the sky, giving us both a shiver as we giggled at one another and I led him down to the corner to help his find his way back to where our night began. I kept making sure to remind him of the ice, but he marched along with just a few minor slips along the way. I felt so loose. So incredibly stress free. And Jaylen's smile kept a fire burning within me that I appreciated for everything that it was worth. I really did.
We could hear Christmas music playing on small intercoms and speakers throughout the neighborhood. Bells ringing, orchestrations played with a melancholy beat, and the smooth voices of a classy old crooner giving every tune his or her all. It was a soothing moment, in my opinion. Jaylen seemed so happy, chatting away with all the joy he had racing through his heart at that moment. And just as we were getting close to the main street, now empty except for his car as other people in the area already knew the deal about the snow plows and the havoc that precedes their assault on Winter...Jaylen took out his phone and said, "Hey! Give me your number so I can call ya!"
I don't know why I paused. Or...then again...maybe I do. I recited the number for him and watched him type it into his contacts, but something about doing so was weighing heavy on my heart. I can't say that I was in love with the kid...but if I ever had a teenage college boy that I desperately wanted to fall for, once and for all...he would be the one. He would be the only one.
We reached his car, and he opened the door to turn the ignition to start it up so the engine could get warm. He didn't have much snow on his windshield to wipe off, but he did so with his coat sleeve anyway. Then he came close to me to brandish that striking smile of his again, up close and personal. His brazen stare nearly drawing me in for another kiss, but he seemed to fidget slightly, bashfully looking for the words to say goodnight.
"Tonight was...a million times better than I ever could have hoped for." He said.
"I second that emotion." I smiled back, almost feeling a little misty eyed as the pressure to do what I felt I needed to do was clutching my heart in its icy cold grip.
We had an awkward silence fall between us, which Jaylen broke with the sweetest little giggle. "I'm not just talking about the 'sex' part either. Like...everything about seeing you here...it was a dream come true. At least, for me it was."
He had this glazed, highly infatuated, look in his eyes...and, while it was the biggest ego stroke in the world to have him look at me like that...it wasn't going to be enough. "It was for me too, Jaylen." I said.
"You know...if you, like, want to meet up again...?" He started. "I mean, my holidays are pretty much spoken for over the next few days, and then I've got to go back to school. But I'll be home for Spring Break though. For sure. Or maybe even before then. I could jump on a bus on some weekend when I don't have finals or anything to study for. Maybe I could sleepover or something?"
"Hehehe...sleepover..." I mumbled to myself. I stepped forward and put my hand on Jaylen's shoulder to make sure that I had his full attention. "Jaylen...you are gorgeous. And I' not just saying that. And you're going to have more opportunities than you know what to do with once you get back to school. Ok?" He seemed a bit confused by what I was saying to him, so I did my best to say it softly...but clearly. "Don't go rushing into anything until you know what's out there. You hear me? You get back to school...and you find yourself somebody special. Somebody of quality. Life passes you by so fast, kid. Don't miss out on anything, trying to race to the finish line."
I think Jaylen was beginning to understand what was happening here, but I could feel his heart break...just a little bit. It was never my intention to hurt or disappoint him in any way, but as his blush deepened and a halfhearted smirk appeared on his lips, I think he was willing to accept the outcome of our wonderful holiday evening together. "Do you think that...maybe I can call you every now and then? Just to say 'what's up'?"
To cheer him up a bit, I used two fingers to lift his chin and give him a little peck on the lips. "I would like that. It'll be cool to know that you're doing good. Living your life. Right?"
"I'll do my best, I guess." He giggled. Then, we saw the flashing lights of a tow truck as it turned the corner...looking for 'bait'. "I suppose this is it then, huh?"
"Yeah. I guess it is..." I didn't want to get too choked up over this. That boy deserves to take life by the balls and blaze a trail for himself that will dazzle the whole world...not anchored down here with someone like me. "You drive safe, ok?"
With a sideways look, he said, "Are you sure that maybe we can't like...meet up for drinks again some time?"
"You're not old enough to drink, Jaylen." I grinned.
"Hot sex, then? I'm down for that. I'm REALLY down for more of option B!"
He can be a sly one when he wants to be. Instead, I just told him, "You just make sure you give me a chance to approve or disapprove of that first serious boyfriend that you snatch up. That'll be enough." He playfully rolled his eyes. "You'll do fine, kiddo. Trust me, you can have your pick. Anyone you want. So you go find that person that you need. Somebody magical. Impress me. And don't settle for anything less. Ok?" He nodded slightly. "And then you go out there and leave the 'hook ups' behind you. Make love...now that you know how."
Without even thinking, Jaylen rushed over and hugged me tight around the waist. "Thanks, Coach. I love you."
I didn't say it back to him. No need to make this any harder than it had to be.
"It's the best gift that I can give you on such short notice." I sniffled, and as the horn began to blow on the tow truck behind us, telling us to 'move it or lose it', Jaylen released me from his embrace, and I saw him secretly rubbing his eyes as he held back a few sniffles of his own. "Go. He's getting antsy."
"Fuck that guy!" He giggled, wiping another tear off of his cheek. But he walked to the driver's side of his car anyway as I moved back to the sidewalk. He opened the door, and gave me a long stare before smiling and asking, "Coach! Tell me the truth..."
"You noticed me when I was fifteen...didn't you?"
"Hahaha! Get out of here! Go already!"
"Just say it! Dude, strictly off the record!" He said.
With a heavy sigh, I said, "Let's just say that I knew that you were going to grow INTO a fine young man someday. Are you happy now?"
He shook his head, snickering. "Coward. You're such a liar. Hehehe!"
"You're going to get towed! Scram!" I said. But before he got in the car, I said, "Jaylen?"
"You, uhhh...have yourself a merry little Christmas, huh?"
He practically melted right in front of me when he heard that. "You too...'Coach'." And he flashed me one last heartbreaking smile before starting his car up and driving away, with me waving him off until he was out of sight.
Yeah, I know, I know...I probably threw away another irretrievable opportunity away tonight, and I'll be adding it to my list of regrets later on. But that decision wasn't about me. It was about Jaylen. And as much as I would love to keep him all to myself...it wouldn't be fair to have him rack up a long list of his own regrets, just for the chance to stop by on the occasional weekend for a good time. He's better than that. So much better.
Go live life, kid. Get out in the world, explore everything you can, and do it better than I did. That, alone, is enough to make me happy. Believe me.
Walking home, I was listening to more of that holiday music, seeing the blinking lights and the Santa Claus decorations in the store windows...and I couldn't help but to think...
...Maybe I should invest in a Christmas tree or something for the apartment. I'm sort of getting into the spirit now. Heh...thanks Jaylen. You were the gift I needed tonight.
Thank you...and Merry Christmas...